Having only experience my own journey, I am unqualified to prescribe a definitive solution for anyone. There are no “Five Simple Steps” that will fix everything. Instead, I will offer some principles and suggestions that have helped me. I am (1) American, (2) white, (3) affluent, (4) hetero/cisgender, and (5) came out of a conservative Christian tradition, so much of what I offer is from that perspective.
- Every journey is different.
- Trust your experience.
- Anyone with a simple, clear, obvious answer is wrong.
- You are not alone.
- Give yourself permission to grieve.1
- It’s okay (even sacred) to question everything.2
- Your brain is wonderful and bizarre; learning about it may help you to interpret your journey.3
- Humans are most healthy in a small community of less than 150 people; learning about this may help you to chart a course ahead.
- Metaphors matter — feel free to find another one to describe your journey (such as renovation or redesigning).
- Shame and stigma is not from God.4
- Don’t let anyone tell you how or when to start your “reconstruction.”
When (and if) you are ready to start “reconstructing” your faith, here are a few things that I have found helpful.
- Western Christianity took a very dark turn when faced with the Enlightenment. (This results in bizarre situations, such as: Ken Ham and Richard Dawkins actually have extremely similar worldviews, just different starting assumptions.)
- Eastern Christianity is a thing!
- Despite what you may have been told, Christians throughout the centuries have held very diverse views and interpretations.
- Mysticism is not a dirty word.
A lot of the following resources fall into what many call Progressive Christianity. I find the term “progressive” to be a tad unfortunate — aside from the political overtones, I don’t like the us-vs-them implication that anyone else is necessarily regressive — but it’s what we have.
These podcasts were very helpful to me on this journey, because for a while I was so overwhelmed it was difficult to focus on reading books at all. This way, I was able to listen to them during my commute.
- The Liturgists Podcast — “The Liturgists are a global community working to subvert the barriers our society builds around religion, race, gender, ability, and sexuality. Our work is centered around compelling discussion, non-judgmental community, and thoughtful, evocative art.”
- The Bible for Normal People — Peter Enns is an American Biblical scholar and theologian. He and Jared Byas host this podcast, and “[They] tell stories about this messy Bible and what it means to read it with both eyes open to its problems and challenges, and to its promises and possibilities.”
- Ask Science Mike and The Cozy Robot Show — Mike McHargue has been of enormous help to me trying to negotiate the boundaries of science and faith.
There are a lot of good books out there — most also available on audio — but here are a few that stand out for me:
- Faith Unraveled by Rachel Held Evans
- Searching for Sunday by Rachel Held Evans
- Finding God in the Waves by Mike McHargue
- You’re a Miracle (and a Pain in the Ass) by Mike McHargue
- Velvet Elvis: Repainting the Christian Faith by Rob Bell
- The Sin of Certainty: Why God Desires Our Trust More Than Our “Correct” Beliefs by Peter Enns
- How the Bible Actually Works5 by Peter Enns
The biggest piece of advice I would give: Find a safe space and safe people to journey with. And as Bill and Ted say: “Be excellent to each other!” If you’re in Knoxville, get in touch! (rob@campfireonthemargins.com)
1 Recommended book: Anxiety: The Missing Stage of Grief by Claire Bidwell Smith
2 Recommended book: The Sacredness of Questioning Everything by David Dark
3 Recommended book: The Body Keeps the Score by Bessel van der Kolk, M.D.
4 Here I am distinguishing between shame and guilt in the way that Brené Brown does — guilt is “I did something wrong,” shame is “I am something wrong.”
5 Full title: How the Bible Actually Works: In Which I Explain How An Ancient, Ambiguous, and Diverse Book Leads Us to Wisdom Rather Than Answers—and Why That’s Great News